I'm having a minor aneurysm due to this writers block. I delete, refresh, sanitize and try over and over. What do I want to say. Overwhelmed with my thoughts. I guess I just can't write when I'm in the middle east. I need some tranquility and surprisingly, home just doesn't do it. All I know is that when I can't write , a weird feeling starts to cook. Thriving somewhere in my deep recesses, growing and mushrooming. Driving me crazy. But what do I want to say: That I'm hard on myself, that I'm scared of not being able to recognize innocence, that I'm not as perfect or strong as they think, but my imperfections reflect my true authentic self. What you see is what you get. I want to say that I rarely don't get along with people , but I rarely connect. If this curse would unblock I would say it all, like the fact that I hate dogs, and I love drake. That I wont judge you if your shit aint designer , that makes you less fake. That I no longer believe in love , and thats not because I'm bitter. Infatuation yes, but love is a complete mess. Who knows what it is . I would say that I want so much but I need someone to motivate me. Push me around, even though i fucking hate being pushed around. I would say that very few people really get it , so you just have to pretend. Trying to emerge from this block so I can say it all. But wait didn't you just say it? Oh , theres more. I'll embellish it for you next time. I'll make it sound pretty. Like a song. I'm having an aneurysm from this writers block.
Oh this is by far my favorite Vogue editorial , very "girl interrupted" :
Mariam N
No comments:
Post a Comment